Okay, so maybe that title is a little click-baity. I’m not trying to change my body by surgery or a diet, or even exercising. Nothing exciting, really.
I’ve just started to do some things that, when I look in the mirror, make me go, “Oooh, girl you fine!” I’ve always had a very complicated relationship with my body. I grew up fatter than most of my friends, and was very aware of that in my pre-teen years. This year, I discovered Intuitive Eating and Health at Every Size, and honestly, it changed my life. I know it’s easy for some people to switch their mindset and eat intuitively, but for me, it’s like I’m rewriting a very long, very well known book. And in a way, that’s exactly what I’m doing.
But it’s a long and difficult process for me, personally. So when I was furloughed in March, I decided it was the perfect time to dye my hair pink. And when I looked into the mirror after rinsing into the dye, I was so excited to see my reflection. I don’t know the last time I felt that way.
So since the, I’ve continued to dye my hair pink. I bought big chunky earrings that usually aren’t my style. I even bought clip on nose rings. And even though I’m fat, and I’m re-learning that fat is not bad, I also am embracing myself, and I feel like my personality is shining through.
I look into the mirror, and I don’t see bad. I don’t see worthless. I see a girl with a nose ring and pink hair and rainbow earrings and I feel excited. I love the way I look.
Obviously there are still days that I don’t wear the earrings or nose ring or do my makeup (that’s another big one for me. I feel unstoppable in a full face of makeup.) and my hair is gross and I feel gross, but by reflecting my inner self to my outside, I know that it’s okay to have those days. That Katie with the clip on nose ring will be back.
And she’s ready for a revolution.